I am starting a "Meme" - whatever the crap that means. I guess it means you get "tagged" and in return tag others with random questions like goals and favs and other stuff and they have to blog about random questions. In all honesty, I think its just a rouse to get people blogging more so that we who spend WAY to much time reading these blogs will have more to read, and blog about. Thus creating an on going cycle that leads to sinks full of dirty dishes, children watching too many cartoons, and deprived husbands . . . so here's MY CONTRIBUTION! ;-)

My "meme" is What are your goals in wifehood? What are the 5 things you love most about your husband and what are five goals you would like to accomplish in being a wife?

I submit this because I have been tagged with goals in general, goals in motherhood, fav songs, why do I blog and COUNTLESS others but nothing about this. In my opinion, being a good wife is JUST as important as being a good mother. Being loving and supportive to your spouse is just as important as being loving and supportive to your children. And yet we hear so little about it. So many people have screen names, blogs, passwords, and LIVES devoted to their children, but when do you see that kind of devotion to one's husband? So many times, the 'love's of our lives' take a backseat when children are born and I think that can become unhealthy. I adore my kids and of course they are of the utmost importance to me, but not at the exclusion of my husband. And yet, if you say that, some people think you have your priorities mixed up. Especially if you are REmarried, don't even get me started ON THAT! So I say, take some time, really think about this - what is about your husband that you love? and what are some goals you would like to have in the relm of marriage and being a wife?

Top 5 things I love about my honey, in no specific order:

• I love his manliness. I worked with my husband for a few months and never thought about dating him, until I was invited to go out on his boat with him and another person from work. Watchin him handle the boat and the look on his face was a total eye opener. He had this confidence and just exuded manhood, I was totally caught off guard! He always knows how to handle whatever situation comes up, he knows when to take control, and also when to let me handle things. He knows how and when to stand up to me and to call me on my sh**. I LOVE THAT. I can be a bit** sometimes and I need to be brought back down to earth. But he does it with love and just the right amount of boldness that it has made me such a better person. I always said it would take a pretty tough man to handle me, I was lucky to find one!

• I love his sensitivity. It is hard in this world to find a man who can be a man's man and yet be able to have a wonderful sensitive side. He can be so tough and yet has always shown me his sensitivity. He remembered the song playing on the radio the first time he told me he loved me. He cried at our wedding when he saw our children come down the aisle together and then me, his beautiful bride, right behind them. He knows when it is appropriate and important to express his feelings.

• I love his provider attitude. He has always taken care of me and our children. No matter what we were going through, financially and emotionally, he has ALWAYS been able to rise to the occassion. And he doesn't give off the attitude of doing it because he 'has to', he does it because that is who he is and he takes great pride in taking care of all of us. When he and I started dating, he cooked, cleaned, and supported himself and his son - a family of two. Then there was me, then I got pregnant and there was one more, then we got married and now all together there are 6 of us! That is a lot for a man to take on and to do so more than willingly. When we found out I was pregnant (QUITE unexpectedly) he had already decided that (if I wanted to) he wanted me to stay home with our baby, and that meant he would have to go from financially supporting two people, to supporting 6! So he went out and got a great job that paid WAY more and had the benefits we needed. He has done that again since we decided we wanted to buy a home. He has made the sacrifice of giving up a boat that he once LOVED so we could be in a better position to buy the home we wanted.

• I love how much he loves me and all the ways he shows me. Maybe it's because we are still technically newlyweds (2 years in November) but he is still so affectionate with me. He brings me home flowers, texts me little love notes during the day, cooks or cleans without me having to always ask for help. He even cleans the toilet cause he knows I HATE THAT. He has no problem filling in for me, in whatever area is needed, when I just can't find a way to do it. He understands that I NEED time alone. He understands that I need time with the chicas! He even lets said Chicas and all their chickitas (kids) come over and then he cooke for us all! He loves planning things for us to do together, out and alone, as a couple. He also is so good at the family stuff. He always treats my daughters the same as he does his two kids. We feel like family and that is great part due to him.

• I love that he and I are so alike. I was going to write that I love his sense of humor here, but that is so small compared to how much we really do have in common. I don't mean JUST the little things like music or something, I mean the big stuff, like sense of humor ;-) It would be really hard to be around someone all the time who just didn't get you. And since I am all about humor over here, that is one thing we just HAD to have in sinc. But so much of what we think about life, family, love, money, the way we act and think, is similar. Not so much that we boar each other though. We have differences of opinion all the time and we actually enjoy challenging each other sometimes. It makes for great conversation, tickle fights, and ... other things ;-) There are so many things that I can tell him that I can't tell another living soul, and I love that. I love having someone so close that you don't worry about judgements or the way something might sound or look. It's just honesty, no matter what the subject is, to me that is priceless. 5a. *Whispering* (He's also GREAT in the sac :-D Hehe - sorry, I just HAD that throw that one in there)

Now for my 5 Wifely Goals:

• I would like to make our Month-aversaries more special. When he and I got married, we decided that celebrating our wedding and our marriage was so much more important that one day a year. Se we decided to celebrate on the 20th of every month. Its a way for us to take scheduled time every month, at least, to remember that before there was a family, there was a couple. We need that time to get back to who we are together, alone. Lately, that has been more of a challenge for us. I really want to start using this again, it was so great to know that at least every 20th we had that time. Now we just take it where we can get it and thats just not enough. It always felt more special too, because of the symbolism, that was OUR day.

• I need to stop blaming PMS for my mood swings. I know it's partially caused by that because I can time it out, and I can tell that I am NOT acting like myself. But what I can do is try and preemt (sp?) it. There has to be SOMETHING i can do. Yoga? Midol? Wine? SOMETHING! I just hate that I will be upset about SOMETHING and take it out on him. And the poor thing doesn't even see it coming! I say something or snap and he gets this look on his face like "WTF???" And I KNOW it's my fault, and that I was wrong, but I can't SAY that! WHY???? I am looking at him thinking 'say you're sorry, tell him its PMS and that it will go away and that you are SORRY' - but I don't. And that is a goal :-D

• To be more affectionate. NO NOT LIKE *THAAAAT - well, yeah sure that too. But I mean like sitting close and holding hands and kissin and just being close to each other. He does that more than I do now sometimes. We were in line for the movies Sat. and just standing there, and i leanded in and started kissing him around his face, cheeks, eye brows, stuff like that, no big deal. Until he says "what's with you? Why you all kissin on me?" Not like, why, but more like why NOW, why don't you do this any other time? The first thing that came to me was "Cause we're standing still" And that was sooooo true. Thats what I used to do all the time. If we're just standing there, I just touch him, kiss him, some kind of contact. And when he said that, I couldn't remember the last time I had done that. That tells me we don't stand still enough. We don't make enough time to just BE. We're ALWAYS doing SOMETHING. I would like to make more time for him, to just BE with him.

• To focus on getting back to ME. Sounds strange doesn't it? But I think it goes back to the fact that so many of us women put our whole selves into being mothers and home keepers that we lose ourselves in the process. We think that we are doing whats right for our family but we are actually hurting everyone. If I am happy and strong and fullfilled within myself, I am more likely to be a happy wife and mother, thereby able to make everyone else happy too. I have heard of men saying that they lost interest in their wives because they didn't really even know them any more, that she had seemed to lose herself and the woman they loved was gone. I don't want that to happen to either of us! I don't want to just be partners, roommates, buddies. I want it all! If I am to have that, I have to take better care of myself - inside and out, body and soul.

• To make sure he knows how truly loved and cherished he is. I don't want to start thinking 'well, he knows how i feel' - he needs to HEAR it to SEE it - well ALL do. I am so lucky to have him and I want him to know I feel that way every day, no matter what. I always say that to my kids, I need to make sure he knows it too. I want to get him random cards and flowers maybe, like he does for me. I want to plan out more for his birthdays, fathers days. Make him feel as special as he does me. I think I'll start by printing out a copy of this and putting it like in his truck or his wallet or something. I think that is a GREAT idea.

So, there ya go, the 5 reasons I love my husband and my 5 goals for wifehood. Now, I'll go ahead and TAG those of you I know that read this...

REBECCA

SHERRY

HEATHER

MELANIE

ANNE

And I would LOVE to see your guys' posts about it and all the people YOU tag. This tag also goes out to ALL of you who actually read this WAY TOO LONG post...leave me a comment and let me know if you take the challenge, I would love to read your post! Maybe you can pass on some pointers ;-)

TNT! Happy 'Meme'ing!