I'm really getting worried. We are on day 8 here people (business days) and nothing. The problem seems to be that the job areas he would like to look in are all having the same issues. New home builders are liquidating their staff right now and there is just no way to know how long that will last. Thing is, he hated that job anyway. But still, to me, a paycheck is a paycheck! I hate that I feel that way. I can't even really tell him that either cause he is EXTREMELY sensitive right now. He'll think I don't believe in him or that I think he can't get a job or something. It's not really that, I just don't like have a family of 6 without a paycheck.

The other day he says to me "So, I hate to say it but I think I may be out of work for a little while." - I about lost it. I just wasn't expecting him to say something like that. This whole time he's been so optimistic so excited even. He kept saying he knew he would get something soon and that maybe we could use the severance pay as like a bonus and take the kids on vacation or something. We would have really been a great place if he had gotten a job right away. He was paid up until a week after they laid him off, he had several days of vacation he got paid for, a month of severance, they even pay our insurance until the end of February. We would have had a NICE cushion, definetily enough to pay off our medical bills AND take a vacation! But then for some reason, he changed his mind.

Thing is, he wasn't upset when he said it. He said it kinda like 'eh - whatever'. He decided to put out handyman adds in the papers and online - HANDYMAN. He said he didn't want to take a step backwards, doesn't that qualify?? I can't say that to him though - OH NO. He says his dad 'used to do the same thing' and that 'it's no big deal'. His dad 'lived off just the one paper in Manteca'. Well, his dad lived in a trailer and DIDN'T have four kids! I just don't see how it can pay the bills? That, and I will not feel safe until there is a gauranteed amount coming into our account on the 1st and 15th. I mean, say this handy man thing brings in $1000 in one week, which he says happens, what about the next week? That is ALL I would be thinking, what about the next week? No matter how much money he made I would NEVER want to spend a PENNY because I would CONSTANTLY be thinking, what about next week? I guess that's my whole control issue rearing it's ugly head. I can't help it. I hate feeling that way too, I'll constantly be stressed out! I already am and it just makes me tired and irritable.

I do like having him around though. I don't have to drag that poor baby around with me when I take and pick up kids all day long. He is always around to help if I need something. He gets up in the morning and helps me with getting her ready so I can get the rest of the kids ready. That has been nice. It's like a never ending weekend. The thing with weekends though...by Sunday, I start looking forward to the week ;-) I just like having my time alone, to get things done or not get things done, it's my time on my clock - whatever! But now he's around all the time and he seems to think it's HIS clock now - HAHA. Plus we get on each others nerves when we are around each other 24/7 - especially if we are stuck in the house, with the kids and the noise. I can handle it usually, but he can't. He gets very frustrated and edgy and snappy and hard to be around. At least right now he has his hunting. He duck hunts and got up at 4:00 Friday morning to go out there. He didn't even shoot at anything but he was in a totally different mood. Just being out and doing something he loves, even if it's by himself, was a good thing for him. The season ends next weekend. He has already informed me that he will be gone all day - both days - next weekend, our weekend with the kids no less. Fun for me but what could I say? It's the last time he will get to do it until November so I kinda have to say "OK! HAVE FUN!!!" He deserves it anyway, if it makes him less depressed then it's a great thing for me!

He has also been working on something for his mom too. She has a rental house that she is trying to fix up to sell. That house needs WORK man. You name it, it needs it. Drywall, windows, electrical, tile, cabinets, appliances, carpet, plumbing - THE WORKS. So she said (insert decrepid old lady voice here) "I'd rather hire you than some other guy to do this stuff" - and at first he was like 'no I gotta find work'. He has now rethought the situation. He doesn't want to do the same thing he was I guess. He keeps telling me that he like DOING stuff, not just sitting at a desk. He likes that he can look back on his work at the end of the day and feel like he accomplished something. I can understand that, I think we all want that in one way or another. So he told her he would do this for this amount and that for that. So he's been installing windows the past two days. He seems to be pretty damn good at it too! They needed to replace 8 windows (!) and he has installed four already! There is a little trim work to be done because the sizes are different but his work is very good. As far as construction type work goes, he seems to be great at everything he touches even if he's never done it before. He installed her cabinets a couple weeks ago and they look great! Too bad that was before she cared to compensate him for his hard work. He was doing all kinds of stuff for her and she basically felt like she was entitled to his help. Like he should pretty much COMPLETELY referbish her house and not want a penny in return - HAHA bitch that AIN'T how it works. This is however giving him the knowledge and experience on different aspects of the referbish process.

Not too long ago he was telling me that is what he wanted to do on the side, to start, buy houses cheap and fix them up to sell. He has the knowledge and the ability to do a lot the work and to know what he is getting into, but have you seen those "Flip That House" shows????? They find all KINDS of crazy stuff and almost blow their budgets and miss deadlines and stuff. THAT WOULD STRESS ME OUT MAN. Maybe they over dramatize it for TV? I hope so because now he seems to think that is the whole reason this mess happened. It's his calling.

But what am I going to do? I don't think I can take the stress of it. Maybe I just need to learn to deal with it. I have talked to him about it and he understands that I need the stability of a regular paycheck, but what can he do if he doesn't have a job? Look for work yeah, but maybe this is the right avenue. He knew what it meant to be the provider. He wanted to be the provider and to take care of his family and to do what it took to make our lives comfortable. I do like that too, knowing that he will make sure that we are ok. I guess I just need to keep that in my head a little more. It's not like he can't make money on the side. One year he did side jobs he made $30,000! ON THE SIDE, on the weekends. That doesn't sound like much but when you think think that it was in his spare time after his full time job, he could have much more opportunity if he put his all into it.

He goes through phases I think, he wants to be the worker bee and get his hands dirty and have something to show for it, until he gets tired of being tired and dirty all the time. Then he wants to be the guy in charge of those guys, sitting at his desk and solving problems with his brain instead of his hands. Until he gets tired of being behind a desk and on the phone all day. I've seen the cycle and I guess I should just let it work itself out. I just need to remind myself that he will take care of us and do what I can to make it easier for him to.

WOW - Do I sound like a simpering house wife or WHAT?! I just don't know that there is anything else I can do. I can't get a job, not a paying one anyway. And to be honest, I like being home with the kids. I mean, they drive me absolutely crazy, but I am getting used to that part ;-) I like being at my own pace, most of the time. I like shopping when everyone else is at work. I like not rushing around so much. I LOVE NOT HAVING A BOSS! Well, not one that talk anyway. I like being able to have friends over when I want, doing what I want and NOT doing what I don't want. I love being able to do stuff for the kids. I like being here for homework and field trips and stuff that my mom didn't get to do. I like the freedom. Maybe that's why I sound the way I do with DH and his stuff. I am grateful to him. He has given me the opportunity to stay home. Well, there was almost no way I COULD work, so he has given me the comfort of being at home and not having to give up too much to do it. So I will stick by his side through this and be supportive of whatever he decides to do because he will always take care of us, that I CAN count on.

I'll just write here and vent a little ;-)

TNT (Till Next Time!)

This is Renee. On January 11th, 2007 the world lost this wonderful woman. I've known Renee since I was 7 years old when she started babysitting me. She had a 3 year old daughter and a 6 week old baby girl already and, I just realized, was only 18. I sometimes have a hard time dealing with my 3 girls and I'm almost 30!! She took care of me and treated me like her own, I never felt like I was just a paycheck. Her daughters and I have grown up together and I feel like they are my sisters. My mom and I always hung out with Renee and the girls and their dad. After a few years they moved to Vacaville and even though she didn't babysit me anymore, they still loved me and wanted me around, so EVERY vacation from school I would go and stay with them. Then I got more into the teen years and saw them less and less. She was at my first wedding though, and grabbed the microphone and toasted to us and used her famous phrase "this is my other daughter, the one I never had to give birth to". I can't even count how many times I heard that, but it seems to mean more now. I moved away, then moved back and she and girls would come for birthdays or showers. But still it felt like we were close, all of us. Like it was one of those relationships that you never really grow away from.

We really started reconnecting when I had my youngest daughter and got remarried. My 'sisters' and I had started hanging out a lot more and getting close again. They were in my wedding and I couldn't have been happier. She was there too and came upstairs while I was getting ready. It was getting late and I was stressed because I didn't have any one to help with my hair and getting on my dress. That was exactly when she showed up. She asked if I needed any help and I almost cried "YES! MY HAIR! MY DRESS! HELP!" She helped me into my dress and pinned my tiara and veil to my head with about 50 bobby pins! She helped me down the hall and the stairs where the little old ladies would stop and say how beautiful I was. She would pipe in with "This is my other daughter! I'm her other mom!" After that day the girls and I have stayed close and I would see and hear from her more often. When one of my 'sisters' recently had a baby I was able to be one of her coaches and Renee told me so many times how glad she was that I was able to be there for her and take care of her when she needed it. At the baby's shower she introduced me as her "other daughter" to just about everyone. Now that I am a mother and think about it more, that really means a lot.

She even remember my birthday and called me. I was in the store and she was telling me how proud she was of me and happy that the girls and I were close again. She even started crying. Course, that seemed to be what happened every time lately. She also called during the holiday dinner I had with the girls and their families. She told me again how proud she was and loved me and how great I had turned out. Then she asked to talk to my husband and told him what a great guy he must be and how happy he seemed to make me. And how she could tell because I had really grown up and become very responsible and that he must be a big part of that - and she cried. I think that was the last time I talked to her.

It's just so sad. She was only 39. She was fun and spontanious. She was loving and caring. She was a wonderful mom and gramma and second mom. She was supportive and understanding. It just seems unreal when I think that I'll never see her again. It felt weird and wrong when she wasn't at the memorial service. I kept expecting to see her come around the corner and then it reminded me that she never would. I can't even begin to comprehend what her girls must be feeling. They all were so close and this is so wrong and unexpected. I don't even really think that it has sunken in for me. She was just so young and wonderful and loved - she deserved so much more.

I miss her. It really makes me think just how fragile life can be and how quickly it can be taken away. She seemed so much more in touch lately. Not just with me, but she was making contact with people that she hadn't talked to in years. She just seemed to be getting her self and things together. Maybe that is what I'll try to take from this whole horrible thing. Let people know what they mean to you. Not just once, but when ever you feel it - every time you feel it. Be connected to people and let them in. Who knows how long we are here for, there just isn't a day you can take for granted. I miss her.

At this moment, my husband is in his boss's office getting the official word that he has been laid off. Yeah, that's right, now we are now a family of six with no income. He told me last night after trying to keep it to himself and not being able to for very long. It started off as a possiblity but by the end of the night it was confirmed by his boss. Appearently, he didn't know until late yesterday himself. It was a corporate decided thing and no one in the chain of command here was consulted or even knew about it until the list came in yesterday. Just cut-backs they said, nothing personal, not based on performance. Well that would HAVE to be true since his 'friend' kept his job! His friend who lies on his reports to make his numbers look better - who only has one kid to worry about - who has an able bodied wife who COULD work but doesn't want to - who has no house payment - gets to keep his job and feel totally superior.

I'm extremely stressed out. Knots in my stomach all night and day today. I do not deal well with money uncertantees. We were just about to be doing ok too. He was getting a bonus we found out yesterday when we thought the company had cut them out. That was going to get us caught up on some outstanding medical bills that were mounting up. Now we'll be losing our vision insurance that pays for us to see Mad's eye specialist in San Francisco. She's going to need glasses before she is two he said. Glasses are expensive enough WITH insurance, and I can only imagine how many pairs this little monster will tear through. We will also lose our gym membership since it's through his work, something we NEED BADLY.

He seems to be dealing with it pretty good though. He seems to have a positive outlook now. He was bad off yesterday, that worried me. He is always in control, always has an idea or a way out or whatever. Last night I guess he was still processing it cause he just looked like he wanted to cry and kept appologizing to me. I did what I could to try and make him feel better but I just kept thinking about the bills and how are going to pay for this and that and whatever. I was distracted and I think he thought I was mad or something. This morning he woke up pretty damn chipper for 5:30 am. Decided to go to work early, get things taken care of, go out to breakfast, work on his resume, go to his LAY OFF meeting, go back to work and finish things up, go out to lunch with boss, head home. He was oddly calm about it. I think I am more worried than HE IS. Ya know what though, I think that actually makes me feel better. I even thanked him for it this morning when I met him for breakfast. It makes me feel like I don't have to hide that I am worried and just be thinking of how to put on a good show for him, hide my true feelings. That in it's self was comforting. He has a wonderful way of doing that for me.

I know this could end up being for the good anyway. He was starting to HATE his job. He was starting to HATE people! I could only see things get worse in that way if he had stayed there any longer. And sometimes you just need that little push to get you out of a bad situation that you think you are stuck in. Same thing happened to me a few years back. I was stuck at a job for 5 years that I hated. I worked alone all day sometimes and when my boss was there, he was an absolute ASSHOLE. I would start shaking everytime he called me into his office. My first day back from a week long vacation to LA, I walked in at 8:30 like normal and walked out at 8:40 with my last paycheck. Right before Christmas too. At first I was scared to death of what might happen, but looking back now, that was the BEST thing that could have happened. I was so unhappy it was ruining my life! So I got that little push that turned out to be a great blessing. I hope this does too. I am fairly sure it will. I just keep thinking about having four little people depending on us, and ME personally not being able to do ANYTHING about it. That must be it - the control issue for me. I can't fix this, I can't even really help, that frustrates me to no end. I think and hope his calm will rub off on me soon though, and not the other way around with me upsetting him.

So just pray for us, keep us in your minds and hearts. I will keep ya posted...

Yes . . . it IS a good morning! A rough night but a great morning! First things first. I thought I would post a few cute pics today.

These pics are of all of us enjoying the sunshine . . .

This little missy is different. She's been my biggest challenge from the beginning in EVERY facet of life. But usually I am pretty good at being on top of the kids, I don't let them get away with shit because they have no reason too. So I started thinking last night as I laid down "why should I treat her any different? Why should she get away with shit? The other kids will eventually begin to see that and feel like we favor her" - and on and on I thought. And it's true. My mom said to me the other day "Whatever you do - don't baby her. The other kids will see and think you love her more - I did. They let Judy get away with everything!" My mom's family was a similar dynamic of four kids - 3 girls, 1 boy. I said "That's probably cause they were TIRED!" She had a point though.


So last night she woke up at 1:00 like clockwork. I heard her pitiful little cry through the monitor but didn't LEAP out of bed like usual. I waited and interperted the cry as "I lost my binky - get it for me". I waited and it only lasted a few minutes and she was back out! WHEW . . . right? HAHA! At about 4:00 I woke to the same cry "I lost my binky - get it for me" but this time it didn't go away after a few minutes, it got louder. And louder. And LOUDER. More insistant and pretty soon the cry was "Bitch get UP here and get my BINKY!". I knew she was ok though so I stayed in bed. It got sooooooo baaaaaaaad. It went on for AN HOUR, but finally at 5:00 she gave up out of pure exhaustion and went back to sleep . . . UNTIL 8:00!!!!!!! I got to stay in bed until 8:00!!!!!!!! DH was late to work because we have no alarm clock and didn't wake until 7. WOW, was it great. It made up for the hours of crying last night. She got up and was in a GREAT mood! SO WAS I! We went out to Starbucks because I still have not gotten my creamer and have been doing great since! I have two more nights that I can let her cry it out (then the kids come home) and I'm hoping that will be all it takes. I kinda doubt it but I'm hopeful. It would make such a difference. I'm not asking for 8:00 everyday but at least 6:30 or so! Anyway - what a GREAT start to my day!


I am feeling empowered today! I took advantage of DH giving me some much needed time off yesterday and went SHOPPING! I stuck to my gift card budget and got some decor stuff for the house that I am actually excited about! I have a lot of cleaning and putting away to do, but that seems a lot easier to do when you have something pretty to put in place :-D This is the first time that I have really decorated a house like this. I love my house and this year I got summer decor, fall stuff, Christmas stuff, and now I have some stuff I like so much I might keep for awhile! I hope anyway - don't know if I can take what I have in my head and actually get it to look good, that has always been a challenge for me. But I am EXCITED about it and that feels good.


I am also excited because DH and I might get to go out tonight! Lodi does this great and fun and FREE thing on the first Friday each month. It's called the Art Hop. Several places in Lodi host different artists and have showings and wine and snacks. We went last month and had a GREAT time. It was so fun to walk around and sample different wineries and different artists. Now that DH has gotten his creative streak back (he is an AMAZING artist) he is all into it. And it's fun to look at the paintings and photos with an artist's point of view too. I am trying to convince him to joint because these artists sell their paintings at these shows and make A LOT of money on them. He has entered the "Art and Wine on the Square" show this June and is SO excited about it. He has such a talent for it that it would be a shame to waste it. It will be so nice to spend some time alone though - we need it.

Anyway, that's my story for today...

Today, 5 things I am grateful for...

I am grateful that I got to sleep in!
I am grateful for my gift cards!
I am grateful for weekends off!
I am grateful my friends have blogs I can read!
I am grateful DH and I might get some time alone tonight!

Does everyone or anyone else get these? Seems like that last week really, I've just been blue. Things that would normally get me excited don't and things that would normally not upset me are. Maybe it's those winter blues. I haven't been opening up my curtains as much and I notice that if I don't have a lot of natural light I just feel tired and blah. I just either don't think about it or just don't want to bother. Then I just end up curling up on the couch with a big blankie and feeling sorry for myself but I'm not even sure what about!!!

I think it's starting to bug DH too. I know it bugs me when he gets like that. It could be that I don't even leave the house these days. Leading up to the holidays I always had to get up and out to take the girls to school, then to pick up one, then to pick up another. I HATED making three trips to Lodi from Stockton before 3 in the afternoon but maybe I needed it? Well, maybe I don't need three ;-) I really didn't talk to anyone though so I don't know what the difference is.

I tried to get out of the house yesterday. We had all the kids this weekend and they were driving me NUTS by the time they left on Tuesday. I really hate saying that A) because they are my kids and B) because it's not like I have them all the time. But sometimes man! I just want to pull my hair out! They were snapping at each other, they were snapping at me! I was snapping at the them...it was just bad. I think maybe they are feeling this whole 'winter/post holiday blues' thing too. They are used to the constant stimulation of school and friends and stuff, but here they just have me and each other - F - U - N.

Yesterday though I was just at my wits end. Then I heard M say to B in a taunting tone "well MY mom HATES Christine" - and I stopped and was like 'whoa did i just hear that right?' So I asked him about it. It was the way he said it that bothered me most. He said that she hated his dad and hated me too. I said more than I should have I guess. I just said that she had never even met me or talked to me so why would she hate me? He said he didn't know. See, I shouldn't have asked him that, I was just keyed up I guess. He said she said it right before Christmas and that would have been the day that he gave her the gift that *I* offered to help him make for her! We were making gift jars for the teachers etc and I asked if he would like to make something for his mom. I was thinking that it would be fun for him to give her something she could open on Christmas that he helped make. So he picked out the recipe for a cookie mix with nuts because "my mom likes nuts!" and measured and poured all the ingredients himself. He was so excited to give it to her. I even gave him a gift bag so she wouldn't see it until she opened it. Then I find out that her reaction was to say to her OWN SON that she hates his dad and his stepmom. SHE WAS THE ONE THAT CHEATED ON HIM - REPEATEDLY! Stupid bitch. For some reason, the whole thing just made me sad. More upset that I normally would have felt I think. So I decided that after DH got home I would get out and have a little time alone. I had all these gift cards and I really wanted to get a jump on decorating the house.

Well - I decided to go to Peir 1 first. I found some wine glasses we wanted that were REALLY cheap and thought I should check my purse and make sure I brought my gift card cause that would SUCK if I forgot it right? Well...it did suck. In my purse was my camera, phone, lip gloss, AND THATS IT. I had not a gift card, not a debit card, not a credit card in sight - not even my license. I was pretty bummed, pretty DAMN bummed in fact. I was just not in the mood to drive ALL the way home and turn around and drive ALL the way back either. So I decided to wander around and see if I could get some ideas on how to deck out the house. I don't know if it was because I was already disappointed or if it was the fact that I SUCK at decorating but I just couldn't do it. I couldn't even decide what color scheme to go with. I was just in blah (it's like being in awe - but bad). I was in blah.

I had planned on going to Target to spend gift card $ too but just figured that would be a total waste of time. All I did have with me was my Starbucks gift card but I was so pissed that even THAT didn't sound good! I asked DH what we were having for dinner and nothing sounded good - but I couldn't pick anything up either! So I went home. I said "ya know, you could make it to Raleys before they close the chinese food!" - he said "yeah YOU could!" He tried to say that I should look at it as a way to get outta the house with no kids! YAY! right? I was like "NO - this is like running and errand - not fun!" Then there was a knock on the back door (or should I say a BANG with a bunch of muttering behind it - mom-in-law) So I said "OK - I'm out!" grabbed my purse and RAN for the door ;-)

We had dinner and he had to get some hunting stuff together out in the cold-ASS garage so I opened a bottle of wine and went to my room. I watched this new show I had been waiting to see with a glass (or two ;-) of my favorite wine. Then DH and I got to have some quality time together - and then went to sleep. So I guess the day didn't end too badly. However, Mad got up same time this morning at 5:30.

The last few days I have just not been able to wake up like normal! Normally I would bring her down and let her watch a show while I wake up and then get her breakfast and start my day. But the last like week or more, I just bring her down to our room with a cup of milk and her show on until like 8:00!!!!! There isn't anything she could hurt herself on or anything and no other kids here so I just let her run amok in my room. Scattering my books, tearing ALL her folded clothes out of her drawers, pulling all of my unmentionables out of their drawers...etc. Making WAY more work for me but I just can't seem to drag my big ol ass outta bed! Not even coffee does it anymore. I tried the coffee thing this morning and started the pot before I found that my creamer was gone :-( I decided I would slum it and try this Hazelnut stuff we had (I'm kinda particular about my creamer) but it was expired. After debating it in my head for what seemed like an hour, I poured it out - good thing too caused it was all curdled...GROSS. So then I decided to try this creamer I bought for our holiday party but we never made coffee so it was still unopened. But its like Pumpkin Chai Latte Pie Spice or some crap. I was a little weary but forged ahead. BAD IDEA. It is sooooooo bad. And I tried adding sugar, less coffee, more coffee ... nothin worked. So I wasted a pot of coffee and have nothing to wake me up now. :-(

See, now is ANY of this entry something to get upset about? I keep thinking no and yet I am. So...is anyone else feeling this way? I know why I do, I just don't know how to fix it! Does ANYONE have any brilliant ideas here?! I need the help cause I got another week until they go back to school and then its still winter so I don't know how I'll feel then. I sound pathetic. Sighhhhhhh . . .

5 Things I am Grateful For Today...

I am grateful that I am not in a mental institution.
I am grateful that the weather is nice and maybe I can let my heathen kids outside.
I am grateful that the baby is taking her nap.
I am grateful that my kids are playing quietly, for now.
I am grateful that I have the internet.

Sighhhhhh . . .

Well I hope you all had a good evening yesterday and are enjoying your new year. I don't usually do the whole resolution thing but I did have a good idea that I am going to start today I think. I've heard about people like Oprah I think who make a list everyday of 5 things they are thankful for. Since I seem to be doing this thing daily or close to it, that might work. Plus I think it would be a nice way to end the blog for me since some of my entries will be vents. So yeah, I think I will try that at the end of this entry since I will be venting.

Well after much debate throughout the day on whether or not to go out - we did end up going to his boss's house afterall. I don't know if DH is going through an episode right now or what but he seems to be getting more and more antisocial. He was literally freaking out yesterday at the thought of going! I was getting a little worried. He just kept saying how he hates people because everyone is fake and no one cares for each other and he hates making conversation because it's fake and on and on and ON. Mostly because of the people he works with, both co-workers and customers. I can see why that would affect him, it used to affect me too when I had to handle pissed off people all day. But DAMN! He was just loosin it. And this whole week leading up he sounded excited! Like it was going to be fun and a great time with the kids and all that.

He also says that it has to do with my HATRED (and i DONT use that term lightly) for his best friend and wife. Mostly the wife but it's becoming the friend too. Ever since Christmas Day when they came over I have just been so angry with them both I couldn't see past it. And I have felt that way before, a few months ago, and refused to be anywhere near them until he invited them for Christmas. I thought I might give it another chance - HA!

My issue is with the way they treat him. Well, I hate her completely but that was what got me the other day. Recently this guy that is supposed to be his best friend is treating him like an idiot in front of other people. When they are alone, all is well. But the last THREE times we ...

Hold on kids are freaking out for breakfast and I need some coffee to give this story justice - BRB (be right back ;-)

AHHHHHHHHHH - ok now where was I? ;-) Oh yeah I hate that big bitch...so I started noticing it at the Christmas party. When we were hanging out in their hotel room having a glass of champagne everything was great. By the time we got to the winery it was all different. Now this whole time DH is battling a VERY nasty flu bug so he is talking loud because his ears are plugged and seemed a bit whoozy cause he had taken some medicine - but he wasn't acting dumb. This guy was acting like DH was hammered! Now, I KNOW that this guy WAS drunk at the time because he told DH later that he started drinking WAY before the wife got home. Something he does all the time! He keeps rum in this truck and sneaks a shot before he goes in the house or whenever he goes out to the truck! Tell me that isn't a problem. Anyway~ We sat at the same table and from the moment they sat down, he had his back to DH THE WHOLE TIME. Everytime he tried to talk to this guy he would turn his head to the side and make some one or two word comment like "yeah" or "whatever" or "I don't care" - but with this RUDE tone of voice! My thinking is that he was trying to take the attention off of himself and how drunk he was and make it look like DH was being a drunk idiot! I know this now because I have seen it several times now. I know when this guy is drunk and I know that the wife looses her mind on him if she finds out. So I guess that is his was of self-preservation. Not the way a best friend should act. This guy talked to the boss the whole time, back to DH sitting right next to him. I was really getting pissed. I think I noticed it more than DH. Well we took our shuttle back early cause we just couldn't handle them or the kareoke anymore. The next day they were up and out and never called like they were going to about breakfast - we were going to lie to get out of it anyway but STILL! RUDE. And yet, what did HE do? We went down to his favorite brewery and got this seasonal beer that he and his friend used to get every year together. He'd missed it for the last two years so he was super excited to get there at the right time this year. So he picked up a jug to take home for this "FRIEND" of his...

Then Christmas - same thing happened. Except his wife was a bigger bitch than I've seen in a while. They were rude and disrespectful and just boarish. Everything they said to DH was condecending. They have no class at all. Too much happened that night to even try to get out - it was just terrible. So I just swore off of them for good. And yes I was pretty open about the fact that I hate this guy AND his wife now. Mostly because of the way the treat DH. Unfortunately, DH thinks it is all just the wife's fault. Which is a HUGE part of it, but you can't take away his responsiblity for the way he acts.

OH and did I mention that I hate their kid too? Well I do.

Anyway I guess I was laying it on pretty thick when DH let me know yesterday that this was a big reason he didn't want to go to the New Years party - they were going to be there. He was all worried that I would say something or create a situation. That actually upset me because I'm sitting her thinking "Hey *I* am not the one who goes out of his way to embarrass you to save face - *I* am not the one who has no class here!" So I starting thinking about it and I guess I was being a little in his face about it.

So we get there and this hoe is all over me! She's like "OH CHRISTINE! COME HERE! HAVE SOME OF MY CHAMPANGE HAVE SOME OF MY WINE! BE MY FRIEND! GOD PLEASE, CAUSE I HAVE NONE!" - ok that last part wasn't exactly what she said - but it's true ;-) It was just weird, very fake. He and she both kept talking to me and I was being good, I was trying to give them a second chance for DH's sake like I told him I would. She tells him to take a picture of us and I was like trying not to touch her - don't want the bitch coodies to rub off ;-) But I was just feeling very weird. So I played it off and tried to enjoy myself. The baby was at home and the kids were playing with the boss's kid so all was well for a little while. Until she goes upstairs and finds that her little brat is "it" at hide and seek. She tells all the kids that they can't play that game because "he'll be sad - DONT RUN AWAY FROM HIM!" - not that HE was complaining. So then we go downstairs and DH is trying to open a bottle of cider for her kid. She keeps telling him that he's doing it wrong in a very condecending tone and then GRABS THE BOTTLE OUT OF HIS HAND and says "You're doing it WRONG. just GIVE it to me let me DO IT - EGH!" like he was some idiot or kid that doesn't know what they're doing! SHE TOOK IT OUT OF HIS HAND. I was so pissed, you don't even know. I just said "Just give it to her before she RIPS it out of your damn hand" - right before she did. A second later I said it about something else she wanted from him "Oh you better give it to her before she RIPS it out of your hand again". - Bitch

THEN - the kids come barreling down the stairs and into the front room. They were playing tag I guess, thats what the boss's kid wanted them to play. This big bitch goes running in there SCREAMING at the kids..."YOU BETTER NOT RUN! YOU BETTER NOT BE RUNNING AWAY FROM HIM! YOU KIDS BETTER KNOCK IT OFF RIGHT NOW! STOP IT STOP IT STOP IT NOW!" and she was not talking to her kid - she was talking to MINE. I about LOST it on her. She was screaming! At MY kids! And she didn't even know what was going on! She just heard them running from the kitchen and ran in there screaming at them! She does this with her own kid - who i might add is ONLY 3 - all the time. She's a complete LUNATIC. I walked in after her to see what the hell was going on. They said they were playing tag cause the little girls (8) wanted to. I figured that she would know the rules of her house and the boss had already said it was all fine anyway. So I just calmly tried to tell them not to anyway because I didn't want her yelling at them - in fact I said that to them "Do you want her coming in here and yelling at you like that? NO. I don't either!" She kept saying stuff too as she walked by "You kids can't run around here like that. You can't yell like that" - she yelled louder than all of them put together. And I can understand the kids' issue. The little girl who LIVES there is telling them she wants to do this stuff and that it is ok. SHE was right, it was ok for her. So why then should they get in trouble and screamed at by some crazy lookin nut job?

She continued doing it all night long. I was at my wits end about an hour into it. Then the boss's wife wanted to play poker. I'm not that into it, neither is DH or the boss as it turns out. There was another couple there from their work too that wanted to play. So DH, the boss, and I went and played pool. Where - I might add - that bratty little bastard of their's was THROWING the pool balls onto the table and BOUNCING them off onto the floor! So we kicked him outta the room and hung out there. That was fun. The kids were playing just fine, for a little while, and we got to enjoy some adult conversation without that LUNATIC interrupting everyone. Well the whole time she and her hubby were playing poker their kid was running amok upstairs. He was being a total brat to the other kids, getting into trouble, and where was his ever doting mama? Winning.

So finally around 10 we decided to get the hell out and go home, we only got there at 8. It was just too damn stressful cause everytime we walked in the kitchen for a snack she would say something about how OUR kids were making all the noise upstairs. She also felt the need to tell EVERYONE how bad our baby is! She had a ball telling them how hard she is for us and what a trouble she is. I just didn't think I could keep my mouth shut anymore so we bailed. We got home and got the kids settled into the living room for a little camp out type deal just in time to watch the ball drop. Then we went to bed and had a glass of champange to toast the new year. May it be full of GOOD friends and GOOD times.

And do you know, I didn't take one picture. THAT is how stressed out I was. I didn't even think about. WOW I HATE THEM.

So I hope you all had a good time or at least not a terrible one. And I guess now I will start that thankful list thing...in no particular order ;-)

I am thankful that I have a loving husband.
I am thankful that I have great kids.
I am thankful that I have supportive friends.
I am thankful that I am able to stay at home with my children.
I am thankful that I started this blog!

This is pretty great for venting man!